Hi Liza-Ann, I love memes too!!! You need to download the image and upload it for it to appear here since that site (like many) does not allow remote linking. Here's how to fix that: Upload and Insert Image. Seeing the Pinterest Board in your sidebar is so cool BTW!
Hey Liza-Ann! First off, I love how you used a meme for your comment wall. That's pretty awesome! I chose to comment on you storybook simply because Ganesha is a character I have become pretty interested with in Indian Epics! Your website looks good, but it is a little plain! I would recommend doing a tech tip for the website and making it look awesome (but not overwhelming or cluttered!).
Your introduction looks great, and is very easy to read! I like how you have chosen Pavarti as the host for the stories. Who better to introduce Ganesha then his own mother? The introduction does a great job of laying a foundation for who Ganesha is, and gives some insight into is incredible character! I think it would be useful to also add in a little bit about the other stories that will be featured in this program to get people excited for every single story. Your sentences all flow very well, and you did a great job writing this post. I also liked your addition of the video at the end of the introduction post. Excellent job! You've certainly gotten me excited to read your first story when it's posted. I'll definitely be checking out your website again to read these stories!
Hi Liza-Ann. I really like the design of your blog! I like that you included multiple pictures as well as a video to mix up your story. I really liked your introduction. I feel like it set the stage so well for your story. Some of the sentences seemed like something a mother would say in order to brag about her son. I liked how you described Ganesha through rumors you might have heard. I think this would be perfect for your target audience, which is children. It is short and concise which is great with children’s short attention spans. I really liked how you finished the introduction. You built up anticipation for the following story. You also did a great job of cluing in the audience to what the next story will cover. The video was a great addition to your story and a perfect way to end an introduction. Well done Liza-Ann.
Hey Liza-Ann, great meme! My husband used to have this app that was filled with random memes and we may, or may not, have spent an hour one evening just scrolling through them while laughing hysterically.
I really like the layout of your storybook website. One suggestion I have would be to change the white background of the text to maybe a soft yellow, or some other light color that matches the picture background.
I love that you created the coverage as an invitation which leads the reader to the introduction. Your writing style is fun and really draws the reader in. I will definitely be back to read more!
The introduction is short and simple, which is great for the particular audience that these stories are for. You did a great job of introducing the key components of the first story that will be included in the storybook.
I look forward to reading the rest of your storybook throughout the remainder of this semester!
So I had to click on your website because I love Ganesha! He is one of the main characters in my stories also! First, let me tell you how FANTASTIC your website looks! I think you did an awesome job with that. I will have to play around with my site more to figure out how to do things like this! It made me want to keep reading because it looked so good.
I liked how you decided to tell this story from Parvathi’s point of view. I think she is an interesting person, so I liked that you picked her. I like how you asked questions such as, ‘…what are some of the first thoughts that come to mind when you think or hear about Ganesha?’ I think that really gets a person thinking about whom Ganesha is. I also thought that it was good that you then answered the question with some of the things about Ganesha. It helps people that do not have any idea who he actually is. You are doing a great job so far, so keep up the great work!
Hi Liza-Ann! I am going to start off, like most of the other comments on here, and tell you how beautiful your website is. The pictures of the elephants as the background are beautiful. I feel like all the bright colors lends to your idea of this website being designed for kids. Another thing that I really enjoyed about your introduction is the video you left at the end. This is EXACTLY the kind of interactive thing that children would enjoy if they were really on your website. It also makes your introduction stand out. Another thing, I really liked the language you used when speaking. In a couple other of the websites I have read, they have been designed for children but then use pretty mature vocabulary. I thought yours used simplistic terms that are appropriate for your audience, yet I was not bored as I was going through it. All in all, great job!
I am just writing to let you know that I will add that link to my famous last words week 5 post! I saw your comment that I forgot to add it, so I’ll get on that. I really like the link it’s very simple, but it helps me to find new words to use when using dialogue. Thanks for catching my mistake! I knew I was going to forget to actually add it. I type everything for this class in word before I post it so that I can check the word count and spelling. I literally (like in the middle of typing this) just uploaded the link if you want to check it out! Thanks again for seeing that and commenting!
First off the meme to introduce your comment wall is perfect! Second I thought your Storybook site was very easy to navigate. I could totally see this as a kid friendly page to tell these stories. The bright colors of the background and beautiful images of Ganesha are perfect illustrations of what you see in children’s books. The interactive video at the end of your intro brought an element of fun to the site after getting some core info. The language and style of writing said kid friendly from the get go. Holding a kid friendly feel though an entire site would be tough because were not kids anymore, but I think you were able to accomplish that so far. I would suggest using the same kind of language with your stories to give it an overall consistent feel. I love that you let Parvati lead the introduction and brag on her son like any good mother would!
Hi there! Your introduction page was wonderful! I really like the layout of your storybook. The background is fun and colorful—perfect for children. The family picture is very fitting since it is the mother of Ganesha speaking at this point. The video was also really fun and an interesting way to get into the theme of your storybook! I do not have any corrections on your introduction because everything looks awesome so far. Good job on the formatting of the story. I think it was a good idea to change the color of the font and also use italics in order to signal an action. It draws attention and keeps the meaning clear. “There are a few lessons that can be learned here, I'll ask you what you think they are when I'm done, so pay close attention and see if you can catch them!” This is a run-on sentence. You might consider either breaking it into several sentences or using semicolons. “There are a few lessons that can be learned here; I'll ask you what you think they are when I'm done, so pay close attention and see if you can catch them!” Just changing that first comma to a semicolon like I have done here should be sufficient. It is a good idea to capitalize the “goddess” in “Goddess Parvati”, because it refers to a specific goddess not just any goddess, in this context. “What some of you may not know is the great Lord Shiva is my father, and is known for his bad temper at times.” You might change this to: “What some of you may not know is the great Lord Shiva is my father, who is known for his bad temper at times.” Just simply changing “and” to “who” would make this flow much better. “I was immediately set to my new job in guarding my mother's bath chamber, which I enjoyed cause I love her very much.” In this sentence, I would either say “because” or use the slang “’cause” with an apostrophe at the beginning. Either way is fine. Overall, great beginning to your storybook. I recommend paying closer attention to details of grammar and punctuation, but the creativity and talent is definitely there in your writing. Keep it up!
This is my first time visiting your storybook “Ganesha Tales for Children.” This will be an interesting storybook for me to read because I do not have much background when it comes to Ganesha, but judging by the title of your storybook. I will be reading some stories that are told to children maybe bedtime stories.
To start off with your coverpage, I think that it is nice and simple with a large image showing who Ganesha is. I also like your background on the website. Is that a custom template? Your introduction was written perfectly. You explained exactly who Ganesha was provided a setting for the storybook. I have never seen anyone use a video in their introduction so you definitely have the most unique one that I have come across so far. I enjoyed your first story and liked how you included some lines in it that show movements (I forget what they are called). I tried so find something to critique your story about but I couldn’t. Great Job!
So first off let me tell you I definitely remember looking at your Storybook earlier! I know I said in a previous comment that I would take a look so I came to check it out, and now I remember! You are doing an awesome job! I think you have made a beautiful website, I know I said it last time, but I really believe it.
I just read your most recent story about Ganesha’s elephant head. I think you did a great job with this. My favorite parts are probably where you put in blue what was happening in the room the children are in. My favorite line, “Ganesha enters the room waving and smiling to the camera.” I know it is simple, but it really gave me an idea of what was happening. I am also writing about Ganesha so I pretty much like everything ‘cute’ he does.
Your actual story, the one that Ganesha is telling is very good. When you are talking about Shiva entering the room on Parvathi realizing, “she did not have a loyal followers.” I believe this should be any loyal followers or a loyal follower.
I really thought your story was great! Keep up the good work! I like that you put the ‘Prayers for Children’ at the end!
Hey Liza! I love your storybook!!! It is probably by far the most creative storybook I've seen in this class! I really liked the fact that you focused the audience on children and using Ganesha as the main theme of your story! I stumbled on your page as one of my free options and I have to say the amount of work you put in your storybook is just breathtaking! Your layout is colorful which fit the theme for children and the way you explained your story was in Ganesha's perspective as if he was talking to school children. I thought that was really creative! I also liked how you added the videos into your stories. It really grasped the theme of your storybook! Another thing is that you color coded your font to show the contrast and Ganesha speaking. Your introduction was interesting and really grabbed my attention. I think kids will actually enjoy reading this since your layout is filled with bright colors! Keep up the good work!
Firstly, I love the layout of your storybook. I love the background; it is very colorful and has many forms of Ganesha. I love the invitation page. It is very welcoming to the audience; I like how it directs the audience to the navigation options and tells invites them to read the story.
After reading the introduction, I definitely wanted to keep reading the story further .The only writing error I noticed was the "The next time time we meet.." in the very last sentence. In the introduction, Parvati says there is so much a child can learn from Ganesha. This reminded me of a particular Pin I came across on Pinterest. Here's the link to it - https://www.pinterest.com/pin/432275264209927960/ I also liked how you ended the introduction by briefing on what your storybook will consist of.
Moving on, I love the idea of switching narrators from Ganesha to Parvati. I did not notice any grammatical errors. Reading the story, I felt like I was one of the children who was present to watch the program. I could envision the whole play. Great job! I also loved how you incorporated some humour into it. Like, Ganesha asking Parvati to continue the story since his head had fallen off and he doesn't know what happened. You did a phenomenal job at keeping the story nonviolent and suitable for the children.
Also, color coding the fonts for actions and dialogues was a neat idea! I can't wait to read more of your stories!
Hello Liza! The meme was just too funny.First of all, I enjoyed reading your storybook about Ganesha! I loved your introduction page because the whole site was so colorful and informative! The introduction was filled with so much information on who Ganesha was and having a lot of pictures makes the reader understand how the character is like. I thought it was very unique for you to include a devotional song to Ganesha. The song was great! Since your storybook was meant to be read to children, having a song will catch the children's attention. The use of different colors also makes it really eye-catching for children because sometimes, black and white is just too boring. Your introduction provided enough information about Ganesha that I wanted to read it more and more! Your story was very organized and I could hardly find any grammatical errors. Keep up the good work!
Hello Liza-Ann! For starters, the organization of your storybook is fantastic. You have the page that it first goes to which isn’t the introduction. It then instructs your readers to go to the introduction which is awesome! Your background, top bar, and photos all seem very similar and it gives a really great ambiance going in without even reading a thing yet!
I absolutely love how you are telling stories about Ganesha from the mothers point of view. It’s true, no one knows a person like their mother does! That is super cool that you included a video with a devotional song to Ganesha. I love how you are telling stories that touch on all the different elements that we see superficially in his pictures. The only story I read of yours was of the elephant head which is the first thing that comes to mind when I hear the name Ganesha. I love how you included his birth story which is super unique! The story of the elephant head is not what I had expected! Great job.
Hey, Liza-Ann! I just read your first story about how Ganesha got his head and I thought it was really great! The way you describe the characteristics of the different characters really gave me some good insight on the personalities of the characters. I found it kind of humorous when Shiva finds Ganesha wandering around the house without a head. What a sight that must have been! I also thought it was funny that Parvati was horrified at first when she saw the new head Ganesha had. I feel like that would be any mother’s first reaction haha. I just read your author’s note and I see that the real story is actually gory? I will definitely have to check that out sometime! What you have included in your author’s note seems so crazy! His own dad lopping it off, and Lord Shani burning it off. I can see why that might not be suitable for children lol. Great job with your story, it kept me entertained the whole time!
Liza, I really like the layout of your blog. I love the colorful background picture. While it is colorful, I do not that it is too distracting from the text because of the white text box. I also love the blue font. Blue is my favorite color, and I also have blue font on my blog. Overall, your blog is very organized and clean.
I really enjoyed your storybook so far! I read the first story of how Ganesha lost his head! I thought you did a fantastic job on the story! I really love your theme for your storybook! I have never seen anyone do this kind of style in both class! It must take some MAJOR creativity to make some of these stories into a story that could be told during a children's tv show. I thought you did a great job making the story fun and enjoyable! Also I love the background of your storybook! It fits so well with your stories so great job with that! I thought it was funny that you put in the part about having Ganesha go looking around the house for his head. I also really like that you add the songs at the end of your stories because it adds to the feel that your storybook is a children's show. I am holding off from reading the other stories so I can come back and read the other parts next week! Great job so far!!
I love how neat your blog layout is. Your labels at the top are organized and easily-accessible. The background is fun and colorful, yet simple. So, not distracting! Love it!
One critique I have is that the week numbers are out of order (I’m not sure there is much you can do about it. I've noticed this happens a lot on other people’s blogs). I know I was able to re-order mine by un-selecting the weekly labels and re-selecting the labels on the settings of the blog.
Hi there! I am happy to see your project is continuing just as well as it started! You chose such a fun topic! Today I read “A Race for Wisdom.” Your video is a great touch; I like that you chose to do it for each story. It really makes it feel like I am watching a children’s show. Below are a few corrections: I noticed your first sentence in blue: “Enters a handsome young god riding a peacock.” Has a small grammatical error. It should be “Enter”—without an ‘s’. In the fourth paragraph of red text: “Father had a great idea though.” You might want to add a comma after “idea” and before “though.” Later on, when Lord Brahma is talking, you might want to add another comma before ‘though’: “This will be no ordinary race though.” After Ganesha has won: “Even The Creator himself could argue with what was in the scriptures.” I think you meant to say ‘could NOT argue.’
Hi Liza- Ann, you have done an excellent job with your storybook. I like how colorful you have made it. It makes it easier to stay focused for me for some reason. You did a great job linking all of your stories together. You can really tell that you spent a good amount of time working on your project. I like how your theme is a children's story. It makes it easy to stay interested. As for A Curse on the Moon specifically, I enjoyed how Ganesha gets mad at the moon so easily. It resembles the temper of a child well. Children have a hard time staying focused, so I think you did a good job breaking up paragraphs. I could hear a teacher reading this story to students using their elaborate voices.Your story also has a good lesson to it. Even though you get angry, you can't stay mad forever. By accepting an apology, you help yourself to release your own anger as well. Great job!
Hi! I’m back again!! I love how kid friendly your storybook is! I agree with Rachelle…your blog is able to keep me focused on the task at hand. I wish I had been able to link my stories as well as you have. I feel like they are a cohesive set and that they belong together. Maybe its from the verbiage you have used or the style you have written them in but it works well! I think you have done a great job with the look and feel of your blog as well. Its super easy to navigate and figure out where I want to go next! I could totally see someone reading your stories on youtube with elaborate animations or even a teacher reading them to her class! Overall I think you have done an amazing job. Best of luck on the rest of the semester and this class!
Your blog was really fun and it looks like you put a lot of time and energy into making the background images fit into your overall theme for the storybook. The title of your blog attracted me to it as I am in the Mythology and Folklore class and haven’t been to the Indian Epics blog until now. I thought your image on your first page was really cool and I like all the bright colors you’ve incorporated into your blog. I also thought it was unique that you added a video to your introduction because that’s something I hadn’t seen before and that’s something that I think others could add to their blog to change it up a bit. So kudos on doing something I haven’t seen before in these classes. Overall, I think you have done a really great job composing your stories and making them interesting for your readers!
Hi Liza-Ann, I love memes too!!! You need to download the image and upload it for it to appear here since that site (like many) does not allow remote linking. Here's how to fix that: Upload and Insert Image. Seeing the Pinterest Board in your sidebar is so cool BTW!
ReplyDeleteHey Liza-Ann! First off, I love how you used a meme for your comment wall. That's pretty awesome! I chose to comment on you storybook simply because Ganesha is a character I have become pretty interested with in Indian Epics! Your website looks good, but it is a little plain! I would recommend doing a tech tip for the website and making it look awesome (but not overwhelming or cluttered!).
ReplyDeleteYour introduction looks great, and is very easy to read! I like how you have chosen Pavarti as the host for the stories. Who better to introduce Ganesha then his own mother? The introduction does a great job of laying a foundation for who Ganesha is, and gives some insight into is incredible character! I think it would be useful to also add in a little bit about the other stories that will be featured in this program to get people excited for every single story. Your sentences all flow very well, and you did a great job writing this post. I also liked your addition of the video at the end of the introduction post. Excellent job! You've certainly gotten me excited to read your first story when it's posted. I'll definitely be checking out your website again to read these stories!
Hi Liza-Ann. I really like the design of your blog! I like that you included multiple pictures as well as a video to mix up your story. I really liked your introduction. I feel like it set the stage so well for your story. Some of the sentences seemed like something a mother would say in order to brag about her son. I liked how you described Ganesha through rumors you might have heard. I think this would be perfect for your target audience, which is children. It is short and concise which is great with children’s short attention spans. I really liked how you finished the introduction. You built up anticipation for the following story. You also did a great job of cluing in the audience to what the next story will cover. The video was a great addition to your story and a perfect way to end an introduction. Well done Liza-Ann.
ReplyDeleteHey Liza-Ann, great meme! My husband used to have this app that was filled with random memes and we may, or may not, have spent an hour one evening just scrolling through them while laughing hysterically.
ReplyDeleteI really like the layout of your storybook website. One suggestion I have would be to change the white background of the text to maybe a soft yellow, or some other light color that matches the picture background.
I love that you created the coverage as an invitation which leads the reader to the introduction. Your writing style is fun and really draws the reader in. I will definitely be back to read more!
The introduction is short and simple, which is great for the particular audience that these stories are for. You did a great job of introducing the key components of the first story that will be included in the storybook.
I look forward to reading the rest of your storybook throughout the remainder of this semester!
So I had to click on your website because I love Ganesha! He is one of the main characters in my stories also! First, let me tell you how FANTASTIC your website looks! I think you did an awesome job with that. I will have to play around with my site more to figure out how to do things like this! It made me want to keep reading because it looked so good.
ReplyDeleteI liked how you decided to tell this story from Parvathi’s point of view. I think she is an interesting person, so I liked that you picked her. I like how you asked questions such as, ‘…what are some of the first thoughts that come to mind when you think or hear about Ganesha?’ I think that really gets a person thinking about whom Ganesha is. I also thought that it was good that you then answered the question with some of the things about Ganesha. It helps people that do not have any idea who he actually is. You are doing a great job so far, so keep up the great work!
Hi Liza-Ann! I am going to start off, like most of the other comments on here, and tell you how beautiful your website is. The pictures of the elephants as the background are beautiful. I feel like all the bright colors lends to your idea of this website being designed for kids. Another thing that I really enjoyed about your introduction is the video you left at the end. This is EXACTLY the kind of interactive thing that children would enjoy if they were really on your website. It also makes your introduction stand out.
ReplyDeleteAnother thing, I really liked the language you used when speaking. In a couple other of the websites I have read, they have been designed for children but then use pretty mature vocabulary. I thought yours used simplistic terms that are appropriate for your audience, yet I was not bored as I was going through it. All in all, great job!
I am just writing to let you know that I will add that link to my famous last words week 5 post! I saw your comment that I forgot to add it, so I’ll get on that. I really like the link it’s very simple, but it helps me to find new words to use when using dialogue. Thanks for catching my mistake! I knew I was going to forget to actually add it. I type everything for this class in word before I post it so that I can check the word count and spelling. I literally (like in the middle of typing this) just uploaded the link if you want to check it out! Thanks again for seeing that and commenting!
ReplyDeleteFirst off the meme to introduce your comment wall is perfect! Second I thought your Storybook site was very easy to navigate. I could totally see this as a kid friendly page to tell these stories. The bright colors of the background and beautiful images of Ganesha are perfect illustrations of what you see in children’s books. The interactive video at the end of your intro brought an element of fun to the site after getting some core info. The language and style of writing said kid friendly from the get go. Holding a kid friendly feel though an entire site would be tough because were not kids anymore, but I think you were able to accomplish that so far. I would suggest using the same kind of language with your stories to give it an overall consistent feel. I love that you let Parvati lead the introduction and brag on her son like any good mother would!
ReplyDeleteHi there! Your introduction page was wonderful! I really like the layout of your storybook. The background is fun and colorful—perfect for children. The family picture is very fitting since it is the mother of Ganesha speaking at this point. The video was also really fun and an interesting way to get into the theme of your storybook! I do not have any corrections on your introduction because everything looks awesome so far.
ReplyDeleteGood job on the formatting of the story. I think it was a good idea to change the color of the font and also use italics in order to signal an action. It draws attention and keeps the meaning clear. “There are a few lessons that can be learned here, I'll ask you what you think they are when I'm done, so pay close attention and see if you can catch them!” This is a run-on sentence. You might consider either breaking it into several sentences or using semicolons. “There are a few lessons that can be learned here; I'll ask you what you think they are when I'm done, so pay close attention and see if you can catch them!” Just changing that first comma to a semicolon like I have done here should be sufficient. It is a good idea to capitalize the “goddess” in “Goddess Parvati”, because it refers to a specific goddess not just any goddess, in this context. “What some of you may not know is the great Lord Shiva is my father, and is known for his bad temper at times.” You might change this to: “What some of you may not know is the great Lord Shiva is my father, who is known for his bad temper at times.” Just simply changing “and” to “who” would make this flow much better. “I was immediately set to my new job in guarding my mother's bath chamber, which I enjoyed cause I love her very much.” In this sentence, I would either say “because” or use the slang “’cause” with an apostrophe at the beginning. Either way is fine.
Overall, great beginning to your storybook. I recommend paying closer attention to details of grammar and punctuation, but the creativity and talent is definitely there in your writing. Keep it up!
Hello Liza,
ReplyDeleteThis is my first time visiting your storybook “Ganesha Tales for Children.” This will be an interesting storybook for me to read because I do not have much background when it comes to Ganesha, but judging by the title of your storybook. I will be reading some stories that are told to children maybe bedtime stories.
To start off with your coverpage, I think that it is nice and simple with a large image showing who Ganesha is. I also like your background on the website. Is that a custom template? Your introduction was written perfectly. You explained exactly who Ganesha was provided a setting for the storybook. I have never seen anyone use a video in their introduction so you definitely have the most unique one that I have come across so far. I enjoyed your first story and liked how you included some lines in it that show movements (I forget what they are called). I tried so find something to critique your story about but I couldn’t. Great Job!
So first off let me tell you I definitely remember looking at your Storybook earlier! I know I said in a previous comment that I would take a look so I came to check it out, and now I remember! You are doing an awesome job! I think you have made a beautiful website, I know I said it last time, but I really believe it.
ReplyDeleteI just read your most recent story about Ganesha’s elephant head. I think you did a great job with this. My favorite parts are probably where you put in blue what was happening in the room the children are in. My favorite line, “Ganesha enters the room waving and smiling to the camera.” I know it is simple, but it really gave me an idea of what was happening. I am also writing about Ganesha so I pretty much like everything ‘cute’ he does.
Your actual story, the one that Ganesha is telling is very good. When you are talking about Shiva entering the room on Parvathi realizing, “she did not have a loyal followers.” I believe this should be any loyal followers or a loyal follower.
I really thought your story was great! Keep up the good work! I like that you put the ‘Prayers for Children’ at the end!
Hey Liza! I love your storybook!!! It is probably by far the most creative storybook I've seen in this class! I really liked the fact that you focused the audience on children and using Ganesha as the main theme of your story! I stumbled on your page as one of my free options and I have to say the amount of work you put in your storybook is just breathtaking! Your layout is colorful which fit the theme for children and the way you explained your story was in Ganesha's perspective as if he was talking to school children. I thought that was really creative! I also liked how you added the videos into your stories. It really grasped the theme of your storybook! Another thing is that you color coded your font to show the contrast and Ganesha speaking. Your introduction was interesting and really grabbed my attention. I think kids will actually enjoy reading this since your layout is filled with bright colors! Keep up the good work!
ReplyDeleteLiza,
ReplyDeleteFirstly, I love the layout of your storybook. I love the background; it is very colorful and has many forms of Ganesha. I love the invitation page. It is very welcoming to the audience; I like how it directs the audience to the navigation options and tells invites them to read the story.
After reading the introduction, I definitely wanted to keep reading the story further .The only writing error I noticed was the "The next time time we meet.." in the very last sentence. In the introduction, Parvati says there is so much a child can learn from Ganesha. This reminded me of a particular Pin I came across on Pinterest. Here's the link to it - https://www.pinterest.com/pin/432275264209927960/
I also liked how you ended the introduction by briefing on what your storybook will consist of.
Moving on, I love the idea of switching narrators from Ganesha to Parvati. I did not notice any grammatical errors. Reading the story, I felt like I was one of the children who was present to watch the program. I could envision the whole play. Great job! I also loved how you incorporated some humour into it. Like, Ganesha asking Parvati to continue the story since his head had fallen off and he doesn't know what happened. You did a phenomenal job at keeping the story nonviolent and suitable for the children.
Also, color coding the fonts for actions and dialogues was a neat idea! I can't wait to read more of your stories!
Hello Liza! The meme was just too funny.First of all, I enjoyed reading your storybook about Ganesha! I loved your introduction page because the whole site was so colorful and informative! The introduction was filled with so much information on who Ganesha was and having a lot of pictures makes the reader understand how the character is like. I thought it was very unique for you to include a devotional song to Ganesha. The song was great! Since your storybook was meant to be read to children, having a song will catch the children's attention. The use of different colors also makes it really eye-catching for children because sometimes, black and white is just too boring. Your introduction provided enough information about Ganesha that I wanted to read it more and more! Your story was very organized and I could hardly find any grammatical errors. Keep up the good work!
ReplyDeleteHello Liza-Ann!
ReplyDeleteFor starters, the organization of your storybook is fantastic. You have the page that it first goes to which isn’t the introduction. It then instructs your readers to go to the introduction which is awesome! Your background, top bar, and photos all seem very similar and it gives a really great ambiance going in without even reading a thing yet!
I absolutely love how you are telling stories about Ganesha from the mothers point of view. It’s true, no one knows a person like their mother does! That is super cool that you included a video with a devotional song to Ganesha. I love how you are telling stories that touch on all the different elements that we see superficially in his pictures. The only story I read of yours was of the elephant head which is the first thing that comes to mind when I hear the name Ganesha. I love how you included his birth story which is super unique! The story of the elephant head is not what I had expected! Great job.
Hey, Liza-Ann! I just read your first story about how Ganesha got his head and I thought it was really great! The way you describe the characteristics of the different characters really gave me some good insight on the personalities of the characters. I found it kind of humorous when Shiva finds Ganesha wandering around the house without a head. What a sight that must have been! I also thought it was funny that Parvati was horrified at first when she saw the new head Ganesha had. I feel like that would be any mother’s first reaction haha. I just read your author’s note and I see that the real story is actually gory? I will definitely have to check that out sometime! What you have included in your author’s note seems so crazy! His own dad lopping it off, and Lord Shani burning it off. I can see why that might not be suitable for children lol. Great job with your story, it kept me entertained the whole time!
ReplyDeleteLiza, I really like the layout of your blog. I love the colorful background picture. While it is colorful, I do not that it is too distracting from the text because of the white text box. I also love the blue font. Blue is my favorite color, and I also have blue font on my blog. Overall, your blog is very organized and clean.
ReplyDeleteHey Liza!
ReplyDeleteI really enjoyed your storybook so far! I read the first story of how Ganesha lost his head! I thought you did a fantastic job on the story! I really love your theme for your storybook! I have never seen anyone do this kind of style in both class! It must take some MAJOR creativity to make some of these stories into a story that could be told during a children's tv show. I thought you did a great job making the story fun and enjoyable! Also I love the background of your storybook! It fits so well with your stories so great job with that! I thought it was funny that you put in the part about having Ganesha go looking around the house for his head. I also really like that you add the songs at the end of your stories because it adds to the feel that your storybook is a children's show. I am holding off from reading the other stories so I can come back and read the other parts next week! Great job so far!!
Liza,
ReplyDeleteI love how neat your blog layout is. Your labels at the top are organized and easily-accessible. The background is fun and colorful, yet simple. So, not distracting! Love it!
One critique I have is that the week numbers are out of order (I’m not sure there is much you can do about it. I've noticed this happens a lot on other people’s blogs). I know I was able to re-order mine by un-selecting the weekly labels and re-selecting the labels on the settings of the blog.
Hi there!
ReplyDeleteI am happy to see your project is continuing just as well as it started! You chose such a fun topic! Today I read “A Race for Wisdom.” Your video is a great touch; I like that you chose to do it for each story. It really makes it feel like I am watching a children’s show.
Below are a few corrections:
I noticed your first sentence in blue: “Enters a handsome young god riding a peacock.” Has a small grammatical error. It should be “Enter”—without an ‘s’. In the fourth paragraph of red text: “Father had a great idea though.” You might want to add a comma after “idea” and before “though.” Later on, when Lord Brahma is talking, you might want to add another comma before ‘though’: “This will be no ordinary race though.” After Ganesha has won: “Even The Creator himself could argue with what was in the scriptures.” I think you meant to say ‘could NOT argue.’
Hi Liza- Ann, you have done an excellent job with your storybook. I like how colorful you have made it. It makes it easier to stay focused for me for some reason. You did a great job linking all of your stories together. You can really tell that you spent a good amount of time working on your project. I like how your theme is a children's story. It makes it easy to stay interested. As for A Curse on the Moon specifically, I enjoyed how Ganesha gets mad at the moon so easily. It resembles the temper of a child well. Children have a hard time staying focused, so I think you did a good job breaking up paragraphs. I could hear a teacher reading this story to students using their elaborate voices.Your story also has a good lesson to it. Even though you get angry, you can't stay mad forever. By accepting an apology, you help yourself to release your own anger as well. Great job!
ReplyDeleteHi! I’m back again!! I love how kid friendly your storybook is! I agree with Rachelle…your blog is able to keep me focused on the task at hand. I wish I had been able to link my stories as well as you have. I feel like they are a cohesive set and that they belong together. Maybe its from the verbiage you have used or the style you have written them in but it works well! I think you have done a great job with the look and feel of your blog as well. Its super easy to navigate and figure out where I want to go next! I could totally see someone reading your stories on youtube with elaborate animations or even a teacher reading them to her class! Overall I think you have done an amazing job. Best of luck on the rest of the semester and this class!
ReplyDeleteYour blog was really fun and it looks like you put a lot of time and energy into making the background images fit into your overall theme for the storybook. The title of your blog attracted me to it as I am in the Mythology and Folklore class and haven’t been to the Indian Epics blog until now. I thought your image on your first page was really cool and I like all the bright colors you’ve incorporated into your blog. I also thought it was unique that you added a video to your introduction because that’s something I hadn’t seen before and that’s something that I think others could add to their blog to change it up a bit. So kudos on doing something I haven’t seen before in these classes. Overall, I think you have done a really great job composing your stories and making them interesting for your readers!
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